Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in secretagentchic's LiveJournal:

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Sunday, October 17th, 2004
4:26 pm	I'm not too sure why I continue to update this thing... Umm...well it's Sunday and I'm doing lots of homework and procrastinating and kinda dreading tomarrow. My Mom's coming back tomarrow from a two and a half week work-trip and I don't want to deal with her...it was suprisingly a lot easier without her around to try and dictate every move I make. Damn! I hate sounding like the typical teenager stereo-type! But how much do I just want to move out sometimes! And to freakin' drive!!!! Jeez, if I could JUST DRIVE!!! I'm just really confused and torn right now and I now my mom will get home and just try way too hard to try and decifer what's bugging me and when I turn down her help (interferance more like it!) she'll just get angry at me and start yelling and what am I to do but just listen and accept it? I think parents should take a test before they're allowed to have kids! Like, "Are you mentally balanced enough to have a child?" test. Or the "Do you have too many of your own issues to work out to be a proper parent?" test. Cause I know she's not really yelling at me, she's yelli ng at the fact that I'm "attacking" her and calling her on her words. Look! I may be your child, but learn to LISTEN to me GODDAMN IT!!!!I have a brain and logical arguments and I wont go around smoking or having sex and ...jesus! Haven't I already proven this to you!? Can I have a life of my own now!? Or are you too content with just waging a worsening battle between us!? lol! Can you tell that I have a lttle pent up anger towards this situation? :) Well, I'll stop it at that. I hope everyone is doing fine. I love you all very much. Current Mood: a little tired of it all Current Music: Breaking Benjamin: Rain (Comment on this)
Sunday, October 3rd, 2004
2:40 pm	Woah!!! Military time!!! This new set up is cool! Um, lots of things to say...I think it's been a few weeks since I last updated. So it's almost Halloween guys! Like, seriously!!! I'm excited 'cause I don't think I have to work. Well, things are goin' okay, school and teachers are kinda stressin' me out, but, cross-country helps. I've come to realize that I dread the weekends anymore becuase I have to work...am I like the strangest teenager ever!? :) Hmmmm....wow this is completely pointless. I don't have any new news besides the fact that I finally saw Napoleon Dynamite (weird) and Shauwn of the Dead, which was pretty damn hillarious. This month has just been pretty good all round. Hope everythings going good for everyone Current Mood: confused Current Music: NASCAR engines from the tube (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, September 19th, 2004
2:12 pm	This weekend has been insane...I've done far too much than my small brain can handle and I'm still going. Stress is kinda pullin' me down but I dunno, somehow I feel indifferent to it all. Lately I've felt like a terrible person but I've some to realize I can't control what others judge me by. If they interpret me in that way, well...shit. What can I do? Friday was a nonexistent pot-lock at Carols (but a very real one at lunch!:) and some very draining buisy work at Union. Saturday was OUR MEET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And it was like FREAKIN' FUN!!!!! And I got such a good time (well, for me!) and oh my gosh. Just a whole bunch of happiness :). We are such a good team and I love it. My mom's suprise party was after that and was kinda boring and lame (from my point of view). My exuse for goin' to OMega's was to give Mom and Chris the house to themselves but I just needed to get away fom them and the party people...I can't really feel too bad for skipping out on my relatives. I think it's cause I got the weird sense like the party was just a hump to get over and done with (hhhmmm...sounds suspiciously like covey hill...)I couldn't really get myself to mingle cause I was planning ongoing and doing more afterwards. And well today... I left Meg's a like 8 at my mother's great displeasure because I really had a shit load of homework. Then my mom informs me we are to go to breakfast at Howards with like HALF the people from the party the day before. Mmmmk, not too big of a deal I'll just need to leave a little early to get my work done...NOT! We ended up waiting half the mornong to get a table and then sepnding like a few hours getting food and then I tried to get out of visiting but shit...that was like freakin' impossible! So I have to go to work in like a half hour and I still have a shit load of homework...and I want to cry. I love all you guys on cross-sountry though!!! I have great pictures!!! Current Mood: apathetic Current Music: none (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, September 13th, 2004
8:31 pm	Isn't it weird how the mood of the writer is in constant swing... Doesn't that sound like it should be like a chinese proverb or something!? Wow! Is cross-country empowering!!! Life is in its better wave intensity right now...hmmmmm....let's see....well my mommy's B-day is tomarrow and I'm gonna decorate her home office like they do when you work in the cubicals at work cause she was saying how she missed that. Oh!!! The carwash on Saturday was freakin' Awestome!!! But Ryan's boom-box got wet and broke and i feel bad cause I instisted that he bring it...:(. But We gotst lots of money! And me and meg did some shopping/eating/procrastinating on sunday which was cool, welll until my homework load catches up with me this week!:) We have our FIRST meet this Saturday and I'm SO FREAKIN" EXCITED!!!!!!!! Everyone come and say hi!!! It's at Spring Lake from like 10-1. Dudes!!!!! It'll be awestome!! Cha! People: live life to the fullest, seriously, it's so awesome!!!! Love y'all! Current Mood: enjoying life! Current Music: Franz Ferdinand: Auf Achse (Comment on this)
Saturday, September 4th, 2004
10:01 pm	What do people Freakin' Want Anyways!? Sometimes this all just sucks so much and you can't put anything into perspective. You either feel extremely content and reassured in yourself and everyone else or extremely insecure and waiting for someone to give you a dirty look or something (is it just me or does this sound a little like bipolar dyndrome?). I just have so many goddamn questions and NO ONE will answer me straight! I hate complaining, but what the hell!? Again: What the hell do people want!? I can't be perfect all the time, and this expectacy to do so is why I've turned out the way I am! I'm loosing the ability to differentiate between what matters and what doesn't or maybe it's just that I'm beginning to understand what ACTUALLY matters. I don't know, but I heard about the guy who died ut at the coast at the beginning of the week and out of all the story's made to make you appreciate life this one somehow hit home. This guy and his two teenage sons got pulled out by a sleeper-wave (?) and the guy being a firefighter pushed his kids to shore while pushing him self out further to sea (not quite sure how that worked - jeez did that sound heartless!). But I just cannot even imagine such a situation. This guy new what he was giving up He saved his children and died out in the sea! How much does that put your life in perspective!? I think of all the crappy thoughts and "problems" I have daily and think how the hell do I get so caught up in myself? "I do not intend to tip-toe through life only to arrive safely at death." I wish I could just follow through with that, and I know it's gonna be a while before I can ever get to that level with myself. I could probably keep going on like this for pages, and pages, but I'll try to keep things to a minimum: You Know You're From West Virginia When... You only knew one or two Republicans as you were growing up. You actually know someone who has sold their vote for a bottle of liquor. You've never seen a local ballot with anything but Democratic candidates. You think Senator Byrd should be nominated for Sainthood. You've seen Senator Byrd's name on a sign in front of a bridge or highway construction project. You know what commodity cheese is. You've been asked to give someone a ride to the post office on "check day." You know what "check day" is. You have avoided the post office on "check day." You've seen a picture of John L. Lewis hanging on someone's wall right between the picture of Jesus and JFK. You know who John L. Lewis is. You know what a Tipple is. You know what a slate dump is. You played on a slate dump as a kid. You know someone who actually did go to Pruntytown. She same guy got his head shaved and "fell down the steps" at the court house a couple of times before being sent off. Everyone who works at the court house is related to someone else who works there. You sometimes call a paved road "the hard road." You know someone who has driven to a neighboring state to get "real beer" instead of the 3.2 stuff. You've bought fireworks from the same guy with the real beer. The state where this guy went might be called "O-hi." "Vacation" means driving through Wyatt on the way to Morgantown. Down south to you means Kentucky. Stores don't have bags; they have pokes. You cook green beans for hours. You know what a real tomato is, and have a recipe for candy ones. Your parents have threatened to have you sent to Pruntytown. You can watch someone order a hotdog and know in what part of the state they live. You know that Serpent Mound was not made by snakes. You know at least one couple who went to Virginia or Maryland to get married. You can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from West Virginia. *Hope life's going good Current Mood: sick Current Music: Hope this isn't a gross picture for the sick pic (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, September 3rd, 2004
7:48 pm	How am I to reply To all the things people imply I feel the need to defend But will you really listen? I wish the world I had the words, But I was raised to stay in place. I wish I could express that which is repressed... I really wish that I could reassure myself as well as all those around me that I mean well and that the majority of us do try. Try hard and usually fail because we are all at a loss as to what or how to make things better. Sometimes I feel like dropping lots of things because in the end what does it do but just waste your time and usually makes more of a mess. I appreciate the message. I understand what the words mean but I don't think I quite understand in the way I should in order to make such a huge step as to say goodbye. Current Mood: exhausted (Comment on this)
5:09 pm	CROSS-COUNTRY ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel abandoned! Where the hell IS everyone!?!?!?!?!? Hmmmmmmm? What's that?...Oh, NOT online!!!! People!!!!! Where are you? What are you up to? How is everyone!!!!????? Speak! CROSS-COUNTRY IS AWESTOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Aaron!!!!!!!!!!!!(Whining) Even Walter admits it's not as bad as he thought it would be!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You can quite if you hate it! Homework, work,more homework, and some more work. Then SCHOOL AND CROSS-COUNTRY!!!!!! Boooooooohsha!!! :) Current Mood: excited Current Music: What the world need now...is LOVE!Sweetlove! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, August 28th, 2004
8:30 pm	I wish I posted more interesting poetry... Sometimes I don't feel quite myself here Sometimes I don't feel like it's my home I would like to be a place where i'm free to play A place I call my own Sometimes I feel like I'm trapped in a spider's web And each thread is in itself a problem So I try to break free, untangled But i'm back to where I started from Oh, if only I were a butterfly I would fly so high Right past the sky And let go my fears Let go of my despairs I leave them to the air Without a care I walk alone in the dark I wander through the night I lie to look up high To see the starry sky It gives me strength to know There's peace somewhere up there So quiet, so undisturbed I'm mystified In my bed I lie awake And I'm dreaming of that land So far away from me It makes me want to cry *Sometimes when I'm alone, I Cry, Cause I'm on my own. The tears I cry are bitter and warm. They flow with life but take no form I cry because my heart is torn. I find it difficult to carry on. If I had an ear to confiding, I would cry among my treasured friends, but who do you know that stops that long, to help another carry on. The world moves fast and it would rather pass by, Then to stop and see what makes one cry, So painful and sad. And sometimes... I Cry And no one cares about why.* I think these two poems best describe the two main feelings that run through mine and many others' lives. Life just seems like it can be so pressing and suffocating sometimes. I've learned to wish for stronger shoulders rather than for a lighter load but how can you make yourself make such changes as to build stronger shoulders. I know I carry so much fear of how others will veiw these changes that I'd rather just endure the uncomfortability of things but how long can someone endure THAT!? I miss some aspects that I got out of my old way of living (in the dark) but I think I'd regret so much more if I left behind all I've learned since then. Sometimes I wonder if the reason we can get so sad and feel such intense yearning for things of old is because we understand on some level that we're actually missing part of the bigger picture. That we haven't realized enough yet to fully understand what can make us truely happy and therefore we can never embody those happy moments of the past. I wanna say I miss a lot of things but really, what I miss is the full enjoyment of life that I can never seem to fully gain back in its full strength. Experience sometimes feels like a curse once yopu get to this age but wothout it where would you be? Lost in the chaos of the real world. Doomed to repeat the most simple of foolish mistakes. Really I'm just musing and wondering how many others have come to realize these very same things...I mean it took me such a long time (it seems) to even get to this point and now I don't seem to be able to take the plunge even though I now unhappiness still exists on the edge. Current Mood: disappointed Current Music: none (Comment on this)
Friday, August 27th, 2004
5:38 pm	Okay! Where the HELL is everyone!? I get on and no one's on!!!! It's an abomination!!!! Okay, I know everyone's off to the Pheonix but WHAT THE hell! It's freakin' 5:30!!! Okay well, schools a swing and homeworks a bitch and cross country is AWESTOME!!!!! (Aaron! Join! Dddoooo iiiittt!!!!)And life is good except everyone is gone and I don't think I've really talked to anyone in a week, on-line or off because of work/school/stuff. Otay...got-sta work! :) Current Mood: bouncy Current Music: TOOL! Undertow (?) (Comment on this)
Sunday, August 22nd, 2004
10:33 am	Boosha!!!! SSSOOO my new favorite word! Life is so crazy right now!!! School is starting back up and I'm trying to finish doing like a MILLION things. School is starting back up in THREE FREAKIN' DAYS!!!!!! I can not even belive it!! Wait TWO!!!! Jesus! I haven't even, like, begun to study the extent of my English!!! I'm sssoooo screwed! Life is ssooo cool rigtht now though! Everything is, like, falling into perspective! I'm lovin' it! And also freaking out, but that's besides the point...:). Well, not much is going on besides me trying to straighten crap out for myself and trying to stay ahead of the stress that's gonna crash over me any day now. Some how I just cannot get myself to be afraid - it's commin', I know, but what's the point of being afraid of it when there's nothing I can do? So, I wanna know how the hell, everyone else is!?!? And wehere the hell everyone is!!!??? I sign on and no one's here!!! Comment and tell me how your life's goin'! Please! I must have some form of human contact before I have to start my homework cram-session!! Anyone! Just comment! LOVE YOU JEN!!! :) Current Mood: On my way... Current Music: Franz Ferdinand! So awestome!!! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, August 16th, 2004
2:47 pm	This is for you Michael! 1. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it. 2. Am I lovable? 3. How long have you known me? 4. When and how did we first meet? 5. What was your first impression? 6. Do you still think that way about me now? 7. What do you think my weakness is? 8. Have you ever had a crush on me? 9. What makes me happy? 10. What makes me sad? 11. What reminds you of me? 12. If you could give me anything what would it be? 13. How well do you know me? 14. When's the last time you saw me? 15. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't? 16. Do you think i am attractive? 17. Describe me in one word. 18. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger, weaker, or staying the same? 19. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen? 20. Are you going to put this on your livejournal and see what I say about you? (2 Comments |Comment on this)
2:02 pm	Some R'n'R 'Tis wonderful! First day off in three weeks!Ohhhhh...my feets a achein'(?). Yeah, I really don't have much to update about cause I haven't seen anyone scince thursday at open mic night wich was cool. School starts in a week and a half!!!!!! Who else is FLIPPING out!!! I am!!!! And yeah...I'm making this skirt!!! It's like...SSSSOOOO awestome!!! I can't wait to finish it, oh my god!!! Current Mood: artistic (Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 10th, 2004
9:59 pm	My Feet Huwt!!!! I'm tired and I have to go do some homwework 'til I pass out. Omega's back!!! Quig's back!!! Party! K, that's all the excitment I could muster... open mic night can not come soon enough. Current Mood: exhausted Current Music: the braking of many glasses - painful thought!! (Comment on this)
Sunday, August 8th, 2004
6:22 am	Work = 24/7!!! Good Lord!!! I'm suprised I even had time to make this update! (Thank god for insomnia, eh...:) Well, I had a few days to like see some people when I got back from my Granpa's (jeez! Like...TWO weeks ago!). Saw Kera and Meg both before they took off...come to think of it...Meg should be back soon...crap! I'm so out of it!!! Crimities!) Okay, well Kera and I had some CD burning-fest time - you know, where Kera burned all the Cd's for me and I sat back in awe and wonder as to how a proper computer actually BURNS CD'S!!!!! I'm not complaining (well, okay, yes I am...:) I'm glad I've got this thing but sometimes.....*very angry face* followed by *shaking of the fist*). Me and Michael got together and watched Princess Bride (yes Michael! you were right! Quite the awestome movie!) and then it was like Halloween weather outside so we went for a walk (and I forced Michael to wear a jacket cause he lies and says he'sNOT cold went really he's shivering and DYING!!! Wear a jacket boy!!!:) So, this led us to discuss plans for Halloween and Michael's gonna be a pirate!!!! Oh My God! Can you not SEE it!? Jen, awestomest idea you've ever had! Hey, when did you get such like god-sent creative vibes girl!? Okay getting ahead of myself... Anyways, so then I like did half-a-mound of homework (and it's two weeks'till school -HOLY CRAP!!! Can you believe it!!!!?????- and I'm STILL working my way through it and I'm gonna die!!!). And then I worked for two weeks STRAIGHT at the Union which was awestome - I really like it, especially buisy (Do I spell this right? Probably not...psh, aw-well!), BUISY friday nights cause I'm like mad pro at busing and stocking! And phone orders...psh (Are freaking intimidating!!!), I'm pro (you know...NOT!!!). Oh!!!!! Michael, you totally stopped by and visited me!!!! And then I like DON"T talk to you for like a WEEK!!! I'm sorry! I'll call you tomarrow when I get a chance. And I saw Anthony and (good lord!!!) Ruby. Anthony, was like, "Woah! Is that Meagan!?," You know, cause he said that's what his reaction was like (Ha! Jaimie did that too! LOL!). Ahhh! But really, cool job! Okay! Now...so, like, Jen came over before she took off for her freakin' INCUBUS concert that I will envy her to no end for...:). And then, we, um, hung out on my porch and viewed boring Occidental...OH! So about Jen becoming completely and utterly crazily crafty!!! I'm, rearranging my room cause it was driving me insane!!! And she had like every good idea imaginable!!!! Honey, where do you get this juice!? Where can I get some!? LoL..:) Okay..good lord that was a whole lot of rambling! Anyway...Oh my god, Quig's cming back Monday!!! Man I'm SO out of it! Oh and Meg! Jeez-uz! Okay Michael! I'm calling you and you're helping me sort all this out who's coming back when and so forth...Alrighty, I'm going to go work on my room (why does rearanging also involve cleaning!?) :) Current Mood: + lack of sleep=crazy! Current Music: Somebody Told Me!!!! The Killers (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 21st, 2004
9:15 pm	I HATE Dial-Up!!! So, what's life been like...hmmmm...well, I had some good times at Hallie's party wich was (YES!) totally awestome! And well...yeah...*cough*...I am now currently at my Grandpa's house in Vacaville doing a whole lot of cleaning (God's way of saying you are all scum!!! How much freakin' bugs and dirt can one house hold...ewwwwwwwwww!) :) I've only been here for one day and already I want to go home, and not just because I'm cleaning...I love sonoma county!!!! This place is weird (in a completely different way from Sonoma County!!!:) Well, Michael this update was truely for you cause I felt bad that you were updating and I was not...:)   Current Mood: Home Sick Current Music: None! My kind of music would give my Pa a stroke! (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, July 10th, 2004
3:33 pm	A Walk In Sabastopol So Jen and I attempted to thrift shop but everything was WAY over priced. I still ended up buying these two shirts that were awestome...:) Well, Todd showed up and we just walked around looking at the different stores. Me and Jen got hungary so we went into Whole Foods and got some vegetarian and vegan burritos :). And we also ran into Goeff, Josh, and Waylan who were also in the process of getting food. So after some foodage, Noah showed up and followed us around. We left around 5:30. When I got home I tried this new eyebrow "retainer", basically a clear eyebrow bell - which felt REALLY weird!!! :) I went over to the Union to see how my application status was going and was told that I'm the next in line for a job. Awestome!!! So I came home and changed back into my original eyebrow peircing (aaahhhhhhhhh....so much better:)Then I went to Jen's and spent the night and we watched some movies and passed out (well, at least I did...:) around 1:30. And now I'm home, semi trying to clean my room and talking to Michael on the phone!!! Well, I'm gonna go...:) Current Mood: Thinking Current Music: None (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, July 9th, 2004
12:27 pm	Hangin' Around I've just been chillin' with Jen and Meg...oh! And Kera...okay, well lots of people. So Tuesday Meg and Jen came over for some milkshake goodness down at the Union, then we sunbathed until Meg was beyond the point of freezing and Jen was suffocating her from lying on top of her to prevent further coldness :). Then we watched "How To Loose A Guy In Ten Days", which was pretty funny actually for a chic-flick. Then of course Meg and Jen decided we must play makeup which, again, was pretty funny Wednesday I talked to Michael and Jen and a bunch of other people online - didn't go anywhere and stayed in my p.j.'s 'till noon :). Thursday,or yesterday, I went to Yoga with Kera and did some major stretching! I'm WAY sore today and I must say that it quite sad!!!:)Then I came home to change, swung by Omega's to pick her up, and met Michael at the Guernville Plaza. Me and Meg started a game of checkers with spare change and she refused to finish playing when I trapped her in her last move:). Then we were off to Seconds Last...I think, cool store. Then off to the Coffee Bazzar, then to Safeway, then back to the Coffe Bazzar where Meg flipped out cause she got honey mustard "nibblers" instead of pretzels (Ha!) at which point a bunch of people showed up. Quig and Jen, and then Walter later, of course a bunch of other people too...There was some cool music. And some good card playing (I freakin' won! Alright!:) And I left with Meg and Jen around 9. I really wish my mother could keep her views on my attitude to herself or at least between me and her....Oh well... Now, I'm going into Sabastopol with Jen, possibly to meet-up with some other people, we don't know. It should be dandy. I'll update later. Current Mood: Good but a little angry Current Music: Sara Evans: Every Little Kiss (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 6th, 2004
11:50 am	WARNING!!! LONG-ASS ENTRY!!! Alrighty! So, On the 3rd as well as day before the Fourth of July, I went to Jen's house (CAUSE SHE"S BACK HERE! Booyah! - well, for like a week)and we awed over her new soft base as well as her completely AWESTOME green-shiny eyeliner (yes, we girls loves our makeup! :). Then I decided she was coming to the Analy Fireworks with me to meet up with Omega, Kera, Hallie, and some other people who we were like, "Woah! YOU'RE here...cool!" We ran around Sabastopol for awhile then went over to the show and looked around for people...I think the only other people we found where Adam and Ryan. Then Michael and Josh showed up and it started getting FREAKIN' COLD so we all huddled up together until the fireworks started. They were pretty cool on the scale of fireworks, but kinda short and hokey (what's with the Indianda Jones back-ground music!?). Then we couldn't find my Mom and the car, which sucked temporarily (hmmmm...did I spell that right?). So, that was quite eventful. Note: OMEGA DOES NOT NEED COFFEE!!! Then I went over to Kera's house with Meg on the Fourth of July and they made chocolate fondue and muffins and bean dip to take to Casady's for a fun day of laying around...I was the only one who wanted to roast marshmellows, Godamn it!!! Well, after a few hours we went down to the show and found a bunch of people: Michael, Quig, Ma...(oh, damn I don't know how to spell her name!), and some random people in passing. The fireworks were awesome though! And I think twistlers are my new favorite candy! I dunno, probably not the best thing to eat when you're starving and need like REAL food, but substance none-the-less. Anyway! So YESTERDAY, I went to the Plesanton Fair with Omega and Kera. We had like a roadtrip ( complete with coffee and pastries...well..for the none-vegan passangers :) Again, Omega does NOT need COFFEE. It takes like HOURS for it to kick in with her, but when it does...WOAH!lol!). So, it was like a two and a half hour drive which, suprisingly, was okay because Kera and OMega provide so much entertainment! Once, when got there we did a little shopping in the building where they have all the booths for stuff, and a little mooching of the sample foods...Sweedish fish candy rocks!!!!!! I bought some really expensive ones but SO worth it! Oh! We also did some art judging, well, kinda...:)they had some really cool pictures though! Then, we walked around getting steadily hotter, looking at rides WAITING for my Mom to pull herself out of her work in order to scrounge up an unlimited-rides pass which of course slipped through our fingers cause we didn't swoop on it! Her job is SO annoying sometimes! I don't understand why she couldn't like get the pass first. Not only would we have been more likely to get it, she also would have been able to work after it (GASP, really?! You mean, life can function propery!? Uh...YEAH!). Her having to work, well, in her eyes, later, would have given us more time to enjoy the fair and not make the entire trip pointless...I know this sounds kinda self-centered and I dunno if I'm getting my argument accross but, whatever. Then, once we had lunch and drove back to drop Kera off, Meg and I went to Jen's where she was painting her new base...LIME GREEN! She plans on adding black checkers so that rather AWESTOME! Aaron (well, Quig) was there and later Michael showed up. It was rather crazy and awesome!!! And now I must go because I've taken forever to finnish this update and Michael is waiting for me to call him! I'm off! Current Mood: okay Current Music: Fight-Club: Original Score!!! Techno-fest! (Comment on this)
Friday, July 2nd, 2004
10:06 pm	You know what: NO! I feel like bitching a little more! No one reads this thing anyway! Damn!!!!!! I seem to have run out of bitching-amo! No bein (good...whatever)! I'm just so frustrated with everything! I dunno how to get out of my own head!I'm realizing more and more how much I just can't stand my situation. My constant situation! I can't DO anything! And I can't get any more specific than that without pulling up some really shitty stuff that I don't want just anyone reading!!!!! This sucks! Current Mood: Pissed! Current Music: Still nothin'! (Comment on this)
9:44 pm	Could my Step-father BE more of an asshole!?!?!?!? (A little Chandler Bing for ya...or should I say...Mrs. Chenandalar Bong - just sound it out and you'll know what I'm talkin' about!). He gets angry and takes it out on everyone BUT the real culprit for his anger - and he can be SUCH and ASS about it!!!!!! So my parents choose to deal with it by sitting out on our front porch and drinking some beers to "unwind" (they're not alchoholics, but can you SAY UNHEALTHY!!!!!!!) How about dealing with your crap instead of choosing to push it away until a later date WHEN IT HAS NO FREAKIN' RELEVANCE! I just want to scream at my mother to tell him to shut up and deal with life like everyone else! She would never have put up with this shit from any of her other "signifigant others"! And she certainly never put up with it from me when I was younger...you know around the age of 7 or so...kinda how CHRIS IS ACTING!!!!!!!!! I don't get how she can just put up with his shit when I never got that kind of treatment!? AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Okay...much better now :). Ummm...yeah...oh! I hung out with Michael today. We walked around downtown Santa Rosa and ended up going to the Mall for an Orange Julius beverage...QUITE tasty I must say...the lady assured me that it contained no dairy and I hope she wasn't just trying to make a sale cause it was like far beyond the tasy level of any of the vegan beverages I've had so far! Ummm...we looked in...this store...that I can't remember the name of... But it was kinda scary cause it had some explicit stuff..however I found the giant "shot glasses" with the funny slogans like "10 things NOT to say to a cop", etc., pretty entertaining. And they had like the most comfy-iest chairs in the world!!!! Though I think they were just a display item...oh, well...Then I came home and got to be bored to death and mentally hurled insults at by my step father (for God's sake mentally BREATHE man!!!!!!!). Alrighty...I'm done. Current Mood: apathetic Current Music: None (2 Comments |Comment on this)